Minute Meditations for Each Day, published by the Catholic Book Publishing Co, copyright 1982, and I hadn't picked it up in a very long time. In fact, I am not sure that I ever really took the time to read much out of it before.
Then, this past summer, Maryssa picked the book up, from the shelf beside the computer, brought it upstairs to her room, and asked me to read the meditations at night, after her prayers.
There are days when I ask myself, how can I carry on? How will I teach my children about God and instill in them the desire to keep up a relationship with him when it seems like everyone is against me? I feel like I am constantly fighting a battle, and every time I turn around, the enemy has closed in on me even more. I feel like I have to sneak around teaching them in secret and even become crafty in getting them to mass and other events. There are days when I have no more hope that my children will grow up to become faithful christians. There are days when I want to stop fighting, to just leave them all at home and go to mass by myself.
But I can't. My greatest fear is that the enemy will win and that my children will become spiritually dead. God gave us a soul, and like our bodies, it needs to be kept healthy. I can no more stand by and watch my children die spiritually than I could watch them die physically without doing a thing.
Every other day, it seems that the minute meditation we read was written just for me. Like today's for example:
They that hope in the Lord will renew their strength. Is 40:31
REFLECTION. Those who do not want to succumb in the hard fight for life and eternity need their strength renewed each day. For God does not generally change the circumstances and the persons who are part of our life and who sometimes cause us suffering.
However, to those who trust in Him without reservation, God gives the strength they need. Do I trust in God even when He makes me wait for a long time?
PRAYER. Lord God, forever faithful, restore and kindle my soul every day. Grant that I may run swiftly to meet You.
I talked to Maryssa about this, and hopefully, through positive feedback, and because of my appreciation for what she asked me to do, she will continue to show interest in her faith.
My children see the difference though, between those of faith and those not of faith. More than one has made comments. I pray they continue to notice the difference and choose faith for themselves.