Thursday, February 28, 2013

Illegal Immigration

"An 18-year-old undocumented student named Jessica Bravo made an appointment to meet with California Representative Dana Rohrabacher to share her story. She was met with yelling, statements like "I hate illegals" and veiled threats at deportation."

You know, I have no trouble with a nation wanting to have control over its borders.  It's the the hatred with which so many people treat illegal immigrants that I have a problem with.  See, until you've lived in the kind of situation these people have lived in, you can never really understand why they would be willing to risk their lives and freedom to come illegally to another country.

I also find it quite ironic that the country that still HAS NOT closed down the School of the Americas, which trains some of the "finest" terrorists out there and sends them back to their own countries to spread terror there, also refuses to acknowledge that any of it is their problem.  "We are not responsible for a failed Mexico."  Oh really?  Not even a little bit?

If you want to get rid of the problem of illegal immigrants, you might want to try starting with looking at your foreign policies first, including closing the SOA as well as taking a look at how multi-national companies do their business elsewhere and making them accountable.

What if the pro-life movement went about screaming "We hate women who abort!" calling them murderers and criminals and then in the same instant, refusing to help pregnant women keep their babies, because "it's not our problem"?

Friday, February 22, 2013

Amnesty International and Pussy Riot

I get e-mails from Amnesty International, and most of the time, I support them.  I don't give them money, because they do support abortion, but every once in awhile, I'll sign their petitions, because mostly, they work to free political prisoners, who, for the most part, are working for change in places where corrupt governments are in power, and doing it in a respectful, peaceful way.  This is not exactly the case for Pussy Riot:
File:Pussy Riot by Igor Mukhin.jpgPussy Riot is a Russian feminist punk-rock collective based in Moscow. Founded in August 2011, it has a variable membership of approximately 11 women ranging in age from about 20 to 33, who wear brightly colored balaclavas and use only nicknames during interviews. They stage unauthorized provocative guerrilla performances in unusual public locations, which are edited into music videos and posted on the Internet. Their lyrical themes include feminism, LGBT rights, opposition to Russian President Vladimir Putin, whom they regard as a dictator, and links between the leadership of the Russian Orthodox Church and Putin.
On February 21, 2012, five members of the group staged a performance on the soleas (Part of the sanctuary in an Orthodox Chruch) of Moscow's Cathedral of Christ the Savior. Their actions were stopped by church security officials. By evening, they had turned it into a music video entitled "Punk Prayer - Mother of God, Chase Putin Away!". The women said their protest was directed at the Orthodox Church leader's support for Putin during his election campaign. (Wikipedia)
Today, I got this in my e-mail: "Nadezhda Tolokonnikova and Maria Alekhina, (...) were sentenced to two years in a penal colony for their participation in a February 2012 protest action by the feminist punk-rock group Pussy Riot at the Christ the Savior Cathedral in Moscow.  These two women, both mothers in their twenties, were detained solely for their peaceful expression of their beliefs. They are Prisoners of Conscience."

"Their peaceful expression of their beliefs?"  I'm sorry, but I disagree.  You can't just walk into a holy place and do whatever you want.  Had they walked into a mosque and done this, and been taken away by guards, no one would be protesting now.  But sure, we can go and do whatever we want in a Christian Church.  I don't think so.  Freedom of Speech does NOT trump Freedom of Religion in this case, nor the right of that religion to defend it's holy places.  If they want to protest in balaclavas, fine.  Let them do it in the public square, not in a place that other people consider sacred, where they can be with God in a special way, in a way not possible elsewhere, a place that demands respect, not sacrilege.

Two years in jail is, I admit, somewhat exaggerated, but hey, here in Canada, we jail pro-life protesters for simply peacefully protesting OUTSIDE of abortion clinics.  None of them actually go INSIDE that most holy, sacred temple of death, and certainly none of them have put on balaclavas and disrupted the saving work of abortion providers with loud wails of punk guitars.  I wonder how many years in jail they'd get here, if they ever tried that...

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Shrugging at the loss of life

In a previous post, I mentioned this article; So what if abortion ends a life?

In the February 15, 2013 edition of The National Post, Denise McComish comments on this new attitude of shrugging at the loss of life:
You can’t ask for more clarity than a headline that cuts straight to the chase. A recent Salon article titled  “So what if abortion ends a life?” provides startling yet honest insight into an emerging justification for abortion. Its author, Mary Elizabeth Williams, correctly states that a fetus is a human life yet asserts that this does not diminish her support for abortion in the least. According to her, “all life is not equal”. Some human beings, it would follow, are more equal than others, an argument we’re beginning to hear said out loud.

Read more here:

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Five Secular Reasons...

Over at the National Catholic Register, Jennifer Fulwiler makes 5 secular arguments for not living together before marriage:

1. It makes it too easy to drift into marriage.
2. It makes the proposal anti-climactic.
3. It renders most wedding traditions meaningless.
4. It sends the message the marriage is not important to you.
5. It limits your options.

The most important of these, by far, is the first:
It makes it too easy to drift into marriage
Practical problems like financial pressures or roommate issues can make moving in with your boyfriend or girlfriend seem to be the easiest solution, whether or not you're certain that this is the person you want to be with for the rest of your life. Then, as the months turn into years and you're still under the same roof, you naturally start thinking about marriage -- if nothing else because it seems to be the next logical step. If you've been living together long enough and things are going fine, eventually there's a subtle pressure that makes it seem like having a wedding is something you should do. And when you haven't had the space (literally) to take a step back and objectively consider whether this person is truly the best match for you, the situation is ripe for sliding into marriage by default, rather than getting married as an active, conscious choice that you're genuinely thrilled about.
Read more:

I cannot emphasize on this point enough.  If you are already having sex with someone, and living together on top of it, the next natural step is to make it official.  Having sex with someone releases oxytocin which naturally creates a bond between the two partners.
Recent studies have begun to investigate oxytocin's role in various behaviors, including orgasm, social recognition, pair bonding, anxiety, and maternal behaviors. For this reason, it is sometimes referred to as the "love hormone". (
This works in much the same way that breastfeeding greatly promotes the bonding between mother and child.  It's the same hormone.

These days, most people seem to be trying to ignore this psychological bond, by constant "casual sex" but the bond is still there, however much ignored.  And it makes it ALL THE MORE HARD to leave a relationship that you know is not the right one for you, if you have already had sex with the person.  It is so much easier to break it off with someone you have never had sex with.  The heartbreak is much, much less, and there is no regret.  You may even decide to remain friends, because there is no complicated history.

This is without mentioning that focusing on WHO the person you are with is, instead of focusing on how they make you feel and how much pleasure you can get with them is EVER SO MUCH BETTER for creating long-lasting and HAPPY relationships.  This last point is extremely important.  Sex is fleeting.  Sexual attraction does not last forever.  A relationship based on sex will not last, or be a happy one.

Friday, February 15, 2013

Thursday, February 14, 2013

The very thin line

There truly is a very thin line between what is rape and what is not rape.

So men, when she tells you outright, that she doesn't want to have sex with you, but you grope her anyway; when she pushes your hands away, but you keep putting them back; when she doesn't get up, slap you in the face and leave, but tolerates it, because she does like you; when she stops pushing your hand away, because you are not listening anyway, because she hasn't acquired that self-assurance she needs yet, to really stand up and make you listen, and because she actually still TRUSTS you not to go any further; what do you do?

If she has stopped resisting the groping, do you decide to take it further?  Then despite further attempted resisting, when you've managed to arouse her enough that she can't resist anymore, because she'd never been aroused before and she didn't know what it was like, is that all the invitation you need to go on and finish it?  Because now her body is begging for it, while her mind is still screaming "NO!!"

Maybe it didn't happen overnight.  Maybe it took weeks, or perhaps months, and she still didn't get up, slap you in the face and leave, because she still liked you, and she'd held you off all those times before, and she thought she was an impenetrable fortress.  So you thought you'd lay siege.

What do you call that then?  A challenge?  Taking the fortress?  Break and entry? Coercion?   Sounds an awful lot like rape.  So where do we draw the line between what is rape and what is not rape?  If you are listening to your hormones instead of listening to the girl, because they are talking louder than the girl and making you delusional, that extremely thin line is easily crossed.  When a girl says she doesn't want to have sex, it's because she doesn't want to have sex, and your hormones should take the back burner.

And trust me on this, if you DO have sex with her, she will resent it for the rest of her life.  She may not realize it herself at first, because she will be mad at herself.  "Why did I trust him?"  "Why didn't I make it clear?" (She did make it clear)  "Why didn't I get up and leave?"  "How did I let myself do this?"  She will feel guilty.  She will feel used.  She may even stay in a relationship she doesn't want, just because she's already had sex and feels she owes it to you to give it a chance.

Long after you've forgotten about it, she will still be thinking about it, and she will come to the realization that it wasn't entirely her fault, that in fact, it was more your fault than hers.  And that is when she will start to resent what you did to her.  She'll wonder if you ever even loved her as a person or if you were just in love with sex.  She'll become cynical.  She'll be angry at all men in general, because this kind of thing happens too often.  She'll want to remain single because all the men she meets after you are all the same too.  She'll declare, in a low, terrible voice: "I will never trust another man again."

If you wonder why she breaks up with you and suddenly starts going through boyfriend after boyfriend, it's not because you weren't good enough in bed, it's because she feels dirty and even though what she really wants is love, what she's really getting is abuse because she doesn't think she deserves better or she doesn't think that anything better exists.  If she sticks with you, and if you wonder why, after she's had time (possibly years) to ponder all of this, she's not interested in sex anymore, it's not because she'd rather have it with someone else.  It's because she'd rather not have it at all.  Because sex has become meaningless and she feels like nothing more than a plaything.  If she moves out three years after your wedding, like Diane (in Christopher West's book, Heaven's Song) and then explodes in couples counselling: "You didn't really love me!  From the very first night I met you, you just wanted to get up my shirt!" it's because there is a deep bitterness and resentment there.

Is this what you want?  For your ex-girlfriends to resent you and men in general?  For your wife to wonder if you were ever really in love with her?  To regret what you did for the rest of your life, to never be able to quite forgive yourself, even if she eventually does forgive you?

When a girl says no, it means no.  Even if she doesn't slap you in the face and leave.  When you are either physically or mentally stronger than she is, (older than she is, with more experience, more confidence and/or more determination), and she says no, and shoves your hands away, even if eventually you do get her aroused, it is still RAPE.  It is a much subtler form of rape, but it is still a violation of her wishes.  And, I might add, if at the end of it, you roll over and seeing the look on her face you tell her "Don't worry about it, it's not your fault.  It's my fault.  I'll take the blame." with a self-satisfied look on your face, because you got what you wanted, and you're not sorry at all, you just don't want her to feel bad, know this:  It won't keep her from feeling bad, and it will just make it all the more clear who the dominant person was, and that he knew EXACTLY what he was doing.

Respect means not even trying to get it, when she says she doesn't want it.  Anything else is disrespect.  Anything else is using her, abusing her, and taking advantage of her.  End of story.

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Just because...

... sometimes there are days when I feel like I am spiritually in Mordor myself.  Never physically.  My physical surroundings are quite ordinary.  My life is a good one.  It is only in my mind that I feel a shadow creeping.  

Like the elves, I feel a longing for the sea, a longing to be elsewhere, a feeling that I am not really of this world, that I am out of place, that I was made for some place else.  There are days when I want to escape to the sea and never return.

But it will not be this day.