Friday, January 23, 2009

I wonder...

1. Why is it that you can take a sleeping 3 year old out of his carseat, put him into the stroller, walk around with him, put him back into his carseat, and back into the stroller again, and back into the carseat, drive home, take him out, bring him in, take off his boots, all without him making a peep. But as soon as you try to lay him down in his bed, he wakes up and resists?

Perhaps the answer is to be had in the very sleepy but plaintive voice I heard this morning when I tried putting him to bed.

"You will leave me."

The child knows, darn it. As long as he is in a carseat or a stroller, I am nearby. Put him in bed, and I will go off to the next room and busy myself there. Even asleep he knows this.

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2. Why does Barbie have hair so thick that if she were alive she wouldn't be able to put two hands around her ponytail, while I am stuck with hair so thin, my pinkie finger can easily wrap itself around the ponytail?

Life is NOT fair.

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3. Why do winter coats always make me look like I have an enormous body but very skinny legs?

And, not completely related, but sort-of... why did a slightly above-average height woman like me have to have enormous feet? I'm only slightly tall... I'm sure a size 9 or 10 would have been just fine for my height. And it would have made my life so much easier. Aww, who needs toes anyway? We'll just cut them off.