Sunday, January 20, 2008

If I weren't Catholic, I couldn't be anything else

I drove to Ottawa today, and had a lot of time on the road to think about things. As often happens while entertaining myself, I get on a subject, and have no idea how I got there, but suddenly I'm practically giving myself a university course in theology. I love chatting with myself. It can be so edifying. Okay, so maybe it was a chat with my guardian angel, and he's the one who is edifying. Sam is my guardian angel, and he and I have some very interesting conversations. Sam is short for something. I don't know what. I just call him Sam because I bet I wouldn't be able to pronounce whatever it is that it is short for.

We got to talking about Catholicism and more specifically all the paranormal stuff that goes on within the Catholic Church. I mentioned that all those paranormal shows that Marc watches don't seem to be aware of this stuff, or else they are just ignoring it. "Proof," Sam told me, "that there is a special relationship between the Catholic Church and Heaven. What other religion has stigmatics, religious statues that leak tears and blood, visionaries, incorruptibles, saints who levitate while praying, communion hosts that actually take on the physical aspect of flesh in someone's mouth,... etc.? The proof is there, if you are willing to see it."

"Mmm hmm" I replied, (wisely) nodding my head. "But if you refuse to believe, you can dismiss it all. Visionaries are crazy people who hear voices and hallucinate. Stigmatics are people who self-mutilate, the religious statues are in humid places, or some other logical scientific reason is causing something looking like blood to pour out of them non-stop. The perfectly preserved bodies of saints are pure coincidence, some freak accident of nature caused them to be preserved. Where's the proof that anyone levitated? People will believe anything. Catholics are a bunch of lunatics."

"You know," I said, "When I was young, I used to wonder why God only talked to people in the Old Testament. I wondered what was wrong with the world today that He no longer appeared to people. It's just that you have to know where to look and you will see that there are still prophets today, to whom God speaks or send messengers from Heaven."

"Yes." Sam replied, "In fact, there are an amazing number of people today who receive messages in one form or another from Heaven. Miracles happen everyday. People have forgotten that a miracle happens at every mass on that altar. Mass has become banalized. People do not realize WHO it is they are eating."

"I know," I sighed. "I do it too. I cannot imagine Sunday without mass. It's my drug. My spiritual food. I need my "fix". Sunday would not be Sunday if I didn't go to mass. But I should be going EVERY day. Imagine what a good Catholic I could be if I went everyday."

Sam remained pointedly silent at that.

"I would complain a lot less." I added. "I am guilty too, of not recognizing what a gift God has given us, what a miracle takes place everytime mass is said. I need to find some way to get there more often."

I was silent for a minute. Then, "God is truely amazing." I said.

"Amen." replied Sam.


Just a drop in the bucket:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:Stigmatics
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incorruptibility
http://www.marianland.com/queenship/marian_apparitions.html
http://www.crystalinks.com/weepingstatues.html
http://www.paranormality.com/levitating_saints.shtml
http://www.medjugorje.org/