There is a reason for everything

... I have to believe this, that there is a reason for the way things turned out in my life... God has a plan for me... He wants to use me in some way, if I am here, in this particular place, with these particular people, it is because it is God's will...

If I do not believe this.... I cannot accept how things turned out in my life,... I just don't think I can handle it...

I must have faith, and hope...

But it is so hard to keep hoping... it is hard to keep on going like everything is the same... it is hard to keep on loving and caring... hard to be cheerful... well, not all that hard... but it is hard to not be thinking of how I would like my life to be,... instead...

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