Coucoumellisms

We women are made to love, to give, to be welcoming, to want to please.  It's what we do best when we love someone.  But this desire to give all, to please, to welcome in, also makes us easily manipulated by our emotions. I remember very well how it was when I was 21.  You want to be with a man because you really like him.  You want to spend time with him.  But you don't want sex, not yet.  You want to please him, but you don't want sex.  You want affection, but you don't want sex.  You don't want to reject him, but you don't want sex.  You also don't want to get mad at him for insisting, because you don't want to be rejected either, and you don't want to hurt his feelings, because you like him, but you don't want sex.  So you accept a little more than you're really comfortable with, because you like him, but you don't want sex. Society used to have rules in order to protect its young, open-hearted, giving, loving daughters.  Be...

Or "The Best Time I Ever had in a Pub". It was a Tuesday evening in late April or early May.  I normally work evenings past midnight, but that particular week, I got off at 8:00.  My friend Marcia had just recently found a good job, and wanted to celebrate.  So we went to a pub in the Old Saint-Jean; Glen Morgan's Irish Pub. Glen Morgan's - St-Jean-sur-Richelieu No one goes out to a bar on a Tuesday. The Pub was empty, almost, except for a group of military men in one corner.  Since there was no one else, they had commandeered the music, and were playing all kinds of old classic rock songs and laughing and singing along and generally having a grand time. After sitting by ourselves for a little under an hour, and observing them from our corner, Marcia and I decided we wanted to join in on the fun too.  So we went and sat at two available stools at the bar next to them, which immediately prompted welcoming cheers from them.  They bought us drinks ...

Grief comes in waves, like the ocean slapping up on the shore.  It hits you when you don't expect it. I look at the photo where we are together, and sometimes all I feel is a dull ache, and other times, sadness hits me with sudden, overwhelming pain. I am not sure why our friendship is dead, just that it is, and that you seem to want it that way. I know our friendship centered around one particular activity that you have suddenly, without warning, given up, but for me, it was more than just that activity, we talked about so many other things as well. I am still not sure how we went from being "a team that could be the bomb" (your words, not mine) and three short days later, you stopped talking to me.  We used to talk to each other almost every day, even if it was only a few short lines.  We had projects together, we saw each other frequently.  And suddenly, overnight, without warning, you disappeared. It hurts, like someone took a big chunk of my soul an...

The following is a list of questions to be asked (without prompting) to each of my children, with the answers of each of my children, written EXACTLY as they said it. Some of these are quite astute, and others are just... funny... This was done December 24, 2016.  Jean-Alexandre was 22, Dominic was 18, Maryssa was 16, Raven was 15, Gabriel was 14 and Nicolas was 11. 1. What is something I say a lot? Jean-Alexandre: "I don't know, shuliyan." Dominic: "I don't know... LET GO OF ME!!" Maryssa: "What?!" Raven: "Vamonos" Gabriel: "Let go of me" Nicolas: "Go to bed" 2. What makes me happy? Jean-Alexandre: "I don't know, books" Dominic: "Uh... (thinking...) coffee..." Maryssa: "Books" Raven: "Soccer, a clean house, books" Gabriel: "Nothing" Nicolas: "Hugs!!" (hugs me) 3. What makes me sad? Jean-Alexandre: "I don't know, bad s...

My daughter wrote this for an assignment she had for school: “Smile at strangers and you just might change a life”   -Steve Maraboli- I always believed that if you smile at a stranger or to anyone, can lift happiness in them. I’m the type of person that loves to smile at someone just because. It feels good because I’m the one who made them smile even if it was just for a few seconds and it’s a really good feeling. This quote explains exactly that and that’s why I chose it. The part where it says “change a life” means to me that when someone is having a bad day just the slightest smile can make their day or even when they are having a good day it can make their day even better. I personally love to smile to random people because it makes my day better. I knew this quote because my grandma said it. She is Catholic so she thinks a smile was God’s gift to humans. My daughter To some people it’s not a big deal but it is to me, it’s like a friendly sign. Some people d...

If you have an e-reader, and enjoy fantasy/sci-fi check this trilogy out. (It's also available in paperback on amazon, but costs a bit more) It was on a list of deals of the day, in an e-mail I received awhile back, and I'm not sure why, but I looked at it, thought, "Hey... fantasy/sci-fi, $0.99... what do I have to loose?" I think this is one of those "nothing happens without a reason" moments. If you don't mind some crass details, (like, for instance, when someone sniffs, it's enough to know that they sniffed, I don't need to read the word snot as well... but whatever) once you get over how confusing it is to keep all the different countries straight and the different creatures... once you get into the book, it just takes you along for the ride. And then you start to notice certain things that sound rather familiar... certain doctrines, certain teachings... talk of redemption... and by the time you begin the third book... you're re...

Something someone said the other day kind of struck me.  My friend's husband left her, and among other nasty things he's said about her, he said this: she was lousy in bed. I'm sorry, but that's not even possible.  That's a figment of modern society's imagination and too much porn.  It's the idea that sex is a sport, and that people are expected to perform somehow, to keep things interesting and if they don't, then they're lousy in bed. As if switching it up, or switching partners was what made sex interesting.  As if just being with someone you find genuinely interesting wasn't enough to make sex interesting.  As if you could find sex boring with the one person you think is the most awesome, most interesting person you know. There is no such thing as being lousy in bed. If you think, (and it IS all in your head) that a person is lousy in bed, it is because YOU are not genuinely interested in them.  The problem, my friend, is with YOU....